Monthly Archives: October 2013

It’s HARD….

Oh. Sweet. Baby. Jesus. IN. A. Wicker. Basket!

If I had a dollar for every time I heard this phrase or personally said it… I would be living on a private Island drinking margaritas and being fed grapes by my own cabana boy named Pablo!

A LOT of things are hard that we make it through every single day.  Paying bills on time?  HARD.  Working a full day at a job you hate? HARD.  Brushing your teeth to get all the gunk out from the deep dark spots?  HARD.  YET.  We make these things happen every single day (HOPEFULLY YOU BRUSH EVERYDAY!) Working out, eating right and caring about your health?  HARD?

Two years ago I gave every excuse in the book why these were SO hard to do…. I work a FULL time job and FULL time course load, I own my own place where I have to pay bills on time, I have a ton of extra activities I participate in including my sorority and it’s just too hard to get into gear to worry about those things…. all of this while I eat my Burger King Whopper.

Changing priorities, doing things outside the norm and pushing yourself in a bit of a different direction that is outside your comfort zone IS hard… but hard and impossible are two very different things.  Put it into perspective… if it give you the satisfaction of knowing you FINALLY fit into those jeans you hate seeing your muffin top in.  If it gets you to run that 5K that you have been wanting to do with your significant other and if it gets you to have a few extra years with your kids… isn’t it worth doing something that might be hard?

It was really hard to decide I wanted to change my life.  Bariatric Surgery was the easy part.  TOTALLY changing the way I see food, working out and myself… HARD.  But not impossible.  It takes TIME.  It doesn’t happen over night.  You have to keep trying over and over and over to get it right or else it wouldn’t be classified as “HARD” would it?

If it was easy then we would all be in perfect shape, health and the exact pant size we want.

The biggest factor is not that it is HARD… the issue is… how HARD are you willing to push yourself for it?

Just Keep Swimmin’….

So here I am… two months out from major plastic surgery almost totally healed (fantastically- I might add) and on my way to my first Women’s Physique Competition.

Getting back into the gym has been amazing!  I am with a new Coach who I have been with since July and he is great.  I was really scared that I would lose all of my strength and muscular gains while stewing in a recliner for 3 weeks BUUUUUUT it only took about 2 weeks of gym time to get right back into the swing of things!

I have been on a cycle type diet that he built for me as well as a 5 day a week training schedule (1 hour per day) and have NEVER felt stronger.  I feel myself adding weights every time I am at the gym and it is SO exciting to feel.

The ONLY thing that is a bit different for me is the slow progress I have been seeing in my bodyfat and weight.  When I started losing weight and I changed my eating and workout habits the weight just SLID off of me and the change was pretty quick.  This process is a bit different and in my mind if I don’t see a drastic change right away I freak out and think I’m doing something wrong.  Then I have to take a step back, snap out of it and realize what I am doing is something I’ve never done before and I have NO idea what the progress is like or how my body will respond.  Sooooo….. I just gotta keep swimming.  Consistency is the key.

It gets a bit difficult balancing all of the different aspects of life on top of an eating schedule and workout schedule.  As most of you know my job is crazy hectic because of wedding season.  I have been incredibly stressed and on edge and two years ago I would have just dumped myself into a bowl of cheesy mashed potatoes… fast forward to NOW I forget to eat and don’t realize until 4pm and then I have that “OH CRAP!” moment.  Just like everything else in life it is about finding BALANCE.

Also, as some of you may have read on Facebook- I got the not so great news this past weekend that my Manager has decided not to represent me anymore because my look is so different.  When she signed me almost 3 years ago I was close to my highest weight and could play the crap out of the “funny fat girl” role…. welllll now that I’m not so fat… she doesn’t want to represent me anymore and wished me well.  After a really good ugly cry I decided to look at this as an opportunity.  I thought that my plastic surgery was the last step into my new life and last string to pull from my fat girl life but maybe it was also getting rid of all of those ties to those who viewed me as just a funny fat girl too.  Now there is a whole new world of opportunity in acting and performing ahead of me that I can explore and who knows where the book will take me once it is completed.

Things might get stressful, progress might be slow and I might be just a funny girl now but the best news of all is… I FEEL so good.  My body feels strong and healthy.  I feel energized, excited and determined.

There are always going to be bumps in the road and there will be times where I KNOW I am going to question myself and my decisions in life but I look at these as tests.  Things truly happen for a reason… even the crappy stuff… and I may never know why they happen but maybe those crappy situations are what lead me to an even better situation.

well… that’s the way I’m going to look at it anyway…


Below is a creepy SELFIE since no one is home tonight hahaha check out the crazy bicep!

10/17/13 SELFIE

10/17/13 SELFIE