Monthly Archives: March 2013

When the going gets tough…the tough get going!

Nobody ever said that this was going to be easy.  When I say “this” I mean changing my life and getting healthy.  The whole process is a challenge and that is exactly why everyone doesn’t do it… yes I mean they DON’T do it because everyone CAN it is just a matter of how deep your drive is.

My fat lifestyle was something that brought comfort to me.  NOTHING made me feel better inside than a Venti Hot Chocolate with extra whipped cream and a cinnamon chip scone from the green lady.  I never realized how deep the food addiction can live even when you have overcome so much of it.  There are days where I can still crave the foods that I used to find so much comfort in… cookies, french fries, pasta, fried chicken…the things that got me into my situation in the first place.

I realize now that THIS is where my strength comes in.  It has nothing to do with lifting weights…but has to do with the inner strength that comes from ignoring the stupid little voice in the back of my head that goes, “It’s okay…just get a cheeseburger…you’ll work it off later.”  Oooooh no you don’t!  I’ve come too far now to lose everything I have worked my ass off for (LITERALLY!)

I am not perfect.  I don’t have a perfect system down yet.  I am constantly trying to change things that don’t seem to be working and perfect things that do work in order to find a great balance that works best for me and my body.  There are some weeks where I don’t lose any weight at all… in fact I might gain some weight.  There are weeks where I feel amazing, I’m working hard and the scale goes UP!  I don’t panic, I don’t get discouraged…this is a process that lasts a LIFETIME and I have PLANNED to screw up a few times in that time frame.  I go back to what I did that week…think about what might have worked and what didn’t and try again the next week but I will ALWAYS keep going.  I will NEVER stop.

Being healthy has replaced the obesity addiction.  I get comfort from knowing that my blood tests are perfect, my knees and ankles don’t hurt and I feed my body the clean, fresh food that it has been dying for for so many years.

There will always be bumps in the road.  Things will go wrong and catch me off guard but there is nothing out there that will ever make me quit.




Training has been going great!   The Xtreme/Insane hybrid program is exactly as the title would lead one to believe.  Insanity was given the BEST name for it…it is for sure INSANE!  If you ever decide to do the Insanity program (which I think everyone should try) you REALLY have to dig deep and PUSH yourself.

Last week got a little confusing because it was the “recovery” week for P90X so it was yoga and cardio and the insanity program as well.  I added my own lifting routines at the gym so I wouldn’t lose momentum with my muscles.  I think I did myself a disservice doing this though.  This past Monday I felt incredibly burnt out and I could feel my body just running on E.  This is also due to the fact that I have been working 10-12 hour days and still training as well as not sleeping at night (I’m waiting to hear about a potential promotion at work so I’m stressing a little about that).  My lift on Monday was more high rep/high intensity/low weight and Tuesday was a long cardio session.  On days like these where I’m not going as hard as usual I keep my calories low and my carbs from just veggies.

This past Friday I made the BEST purchase of my entire life and bought a whole rack of dumbbells with sets from 20’s-50’s, also a full rack of plates and a 45lb bar.  I ALSO had a pull up bar put in in the basement.  It is now my sweat factory!  It’s GLORIOUS!  EVERYONE IS WELCOME TO COME OVER!  Gotta LOOOOOOVE craigslist!  Shout out to our good friend Cleveland who woke up at 7am to help me move everything to my house!

Speaking of poundages! I have made it down to 156lbs which was my goal for the end of February.  153lbs is my goal for the end of March.  I also want to be able to do 5 pull ups without the chair.

RANDOM NEWS!  My mommy and I have decided to do a 5K on Mother’s Day…so the former fatty and the fake hip are doing a race…THIS is going to be hilarious.  As a former fat kid the last time I actually ran was when I was FORCED to in High School.  I ALWAYS say that I don’t run… even if I’m being chased I try to negotiate.  Actually I think the last time I ran was for the ice cream man… he always ends up driving further on purpose to watch fat kids run…ASS!  I have started to add a little running into my post workout cardio.  I don’t want to go too crazy with the running because my body isn’t used to it so I will walk for 3 minutes, run for 3 minutes, walk for 2 minutes, run for 3 minutes in an attempt to increase my endurance.  I think this will be a great challenge for the two of us!

If anyone has any training tips PLEASE feel free to share!  I am TOTALLY in the dark here with how to get ready for this race.

Below is a picture I took in my mirror in my room that I look in every day.  Notice the picture in the top corner…it’s me… at my absolute highest weight which was 330lbs.  I keep that picture in my mirror to remind me of where I once was so I can appreciate every single day how far I’ve come and to get excited for where I plan to go from here.

Never again will I ever let myself get as unhealthy as I once was.

Never again will I ever let myself get as unhealthy as I once was.

A little less conversation…a little motivation please!


This is one of the questions that I get asked almost DAILY by almost everyone.  This also seems to be one of the most popular excuses people use to avoid getting their ass in gear…”Well it’s just so hard getting motivated.”  OOOOOOH… I get it!

BELIEVE ME!  There was once a time where my most favorite thing to do was lay on the couch and eat french fries directly off my stomach while watching The Bachelor and my idea of working out was walking 50 feet to the dumpster to throw out the trash.  Getting motivated is WAY harder than I expected it to be.  “EH, I’ll skip the gym today and work out twice as hard tomorrow.”  Uh…yeah how well do you think that went over?  Hint…IT DIDN’T….”I’m exhausted I can’t afford to burn myself out.” “I wake up at 6am and work all day, I just don’t have the time to go to the gym.”

How does the old saying go? “Excuses are like buttholes…we all have one.”  Isn’t that the honest truth?  The longer we put off doing what we know we need to the more creative the excuses become. “My Saturn is out of alignment with Uranus!”  HAHA! There was one girl I was talking to who used the excuse, “Well once I lose the weight I will get to the gym.”  ERRR?! How do you expect to LOSE the weight? Coming up with creative excuses only burns so many calories sister!

When I first started losing weight my weight loss was my motivation.  After my weight plateaued I did start to lose my motivation just a little bit and that was when I decided to change things up and go for bodybuilding.  When I started bodybuilding I realized something incredibly important to what continues to keep me going every single day…


It’s not about bodybuilding, it’s not about weight loss…it’s about being PROUD of the body that I see in the mirror.  I work SO HARD and I am SO incredibly proud of myself and the progress that I am making everyday that that is what keeps me motivated, that is what gets me up at 5:00am for cardio and drags me to the gym in the snow, when I’m feeling sick or tired and would rather stay in my warm bed.  I want to keep feeling that pride and I want to continue seeing how I can progress and what my body is capable of.

I have YET to taste a cookie, french fry or donut that tastes as good as pride feels.

If there is any advice I can give you to help get you motivated if you are finding you are having a little trouble it is this; YOU are your motivation. Looking in the mirror and feeling PROUD of what you see looking back at you is your motivation.  Challenging yourself, pushing yourself and doing what you never thought you could do is your motivation.  Don’t depend on someone else or certain conditions to force you to eat right, get physical and take care of yourself.  You should do these things because you DESERVE IT.

EVERYONE deserves to feel proud of the body they have and the HARD WORK that they put into that.



End of February Weight: 157lbs (GOAL MET!)

P90X/Insanity Hybrid is going AMAZING!  I love this program and am really surprised every single day and the fact that my body can do things that I was never able to do, ie…BURPEES!  I never thought I would be excited to do a burpee!

End of February 2013

End of February 2013


I was SO excited when I took this picture that you can KIND of a little bit see the bottom of an AB!!!! WHEE!

I was SO excited when I took this picture that you can KIND of a little bit see the bottom of an AB!!!! WHEE!